Does Pink Floyd’s “Coming Back To Life” reflect my life?

Does Pink Floyd’s “Coming Back To Life” reflect my life?

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I’m a music addict and not one who likes to dance or needs to feel the beat, no, I need proper lyrics.
If a song doesn’t have a message I’m pretty sure that I won’t like it. Texts are the most important part for me followed by the music composition.
I recently listened often to Pink Floyd’s ‘Coming back to life’ while I’m checking out songs for our wedding day. My husband loves this song and it reflects parts of his life so I was wondering if it reflects parts of my life as well. I would even say that many songs probably would fit into many life stories but not all humans are thinking deeply about their own life. There are always those who wipe emotions away quickly as it seems to be the easy way. I personally would say this way is wrong but I’m not the one to teach others, at least for me I think that I have to face it all and only this way I’m able to reflect, think about, learn, yes, even suffer, because in the end I’m more wise than before. That’s for sure not the easiest way but the most proper from my point of view.

Here’s my personal “Coming back to life” story:

“Where were you when I was burned and broken”
There were times when I was exactly thinking that. Relationships in the past where I thought we were meant to be but when I needed the other one most I was standing alone. A true sign that it wasn’t meant to be but this is something I knew afterwards only.

“While the days slipped by from my window watching”
I had many of these days where you are unable to move. Stuck within deepest grief for whatever reason, scared of when this state will change again or is it getting worse and ends up in a depression? People around me were telling me to stand up again, let go of the past and live and but I was still unable to move forward.

“Where were you when I was hurt and I was helpless”
Wishing for one special person to knock on my door, pick up the phone or show me at least a tiny sign of interest. The feeling nobody cares is the worst and it’s mostly not true as I always had persons who cared but they were not the one I was longing for. I felt hurt and helpless but knew always that I have family and friends who would always be there, nevertheless it wasn’t getting me out of this state as the One wasn’t showing up to be there at my side.

“Because the things you say and the things you do surround me”
Exactly, I remembered words and gestures, moments which passed by already but still were present and overlaid the reality. Life went into a state of dreaming, wishing, remaining still where I want to be although everything around me went on. Getting out was hard but worth it and sometimes it needs someone real to drag you out of this lethargy.

“While you were hanging yourself on someone else’s words”
This is a mean thing as I at least know from myself that these words become other meanings the longer you try to interpret them. Sentences which were totally clear remained in my mind until I saw them completely different just to have a valid reason for myself to hang on a bit longer. Words are often nice and charming but if actions never follow be careful.

“Dying to believe in what you heard”
One thing I learned from the past is that talking for sure is absolutely important. Listening for sure as well. I heard many promises and plans but they never became reality. I’m talkative and I love to talk about deeper thoughts and many other things but there is a big BUT.
Actions have to follow! You can talk about planning something endlessly but if you never start to do it all these words are without meaning.

“I was staring straight into the shining sun”
Sunshine makes happy and I tried to escape from my messed up life and travelled to enjoy sunshine. What happened is that I realized quickly that there’s no escape, sunshine is nice but it will never be able to erase your thoughts and feelings.

“Lost in thought and lost in time”
What this travel and sunshine gave me is time. Time to overthink what I want, where I wanna go, what I expect from my life and even more important what I expect from myself.
Time out of the everyday circle to really sit down and think, forgetting the time and just listening to yourself.

“While the seeds of life and the seeds of change were planted”
It was grounding me, getting me back partly to the person I was before. A change needs time and sometimes it’s not easy to remain in that state when heading back home. But what it does is planting seeds, like reminders for yourself not to fall into the same state you were about to escape from.

“Outside the rain fell dark and slow”
There’s no sunshine without rain and vice versa. Life isn’t always happy and yes, there were days when everything seemed to be dark again.

“While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime”
Ghosts from the past were hunting me, no more daily but they still were present in my life and as the past can never be erased completely they will remain but they will fade and loose shape after a while.

“I took a heavenly ride through our silence”
I never said I hate something but I learned that I hate silence.
Not the silence when you are alone in a house or walking through a forest, no, I hate emotional silence. The silence when two persons who where more than close to each other stop communicating or let me say it better. If you are not getting answers any more. This silence hurts and is able to break a person.

“I knew the moment had arrived”
For killing the past and coming back to life”
It took almost years but the moment were moments, slightly popping up in my life, showing me there is a future and I can make it – alone – just me. Inner strength built up in tiny steps, month by month, week by week.

“I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the waiting had begun”

Waiting for the day when the past is no longer important in the present. It will stay in the past where it belongs to, where it was important but the way forward should be free and open.

“And headed straight..into the shining sun”
Yeah, and sometimes it fits completely!
I struggled for a long time and the way back was hard and full of stones but it was worth it.
I married my shining sun and most important, there is no silence!

 

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